Time to Man Up?

How alcoholism can lead to male infertility

CASE STUDY: Tom in London
Some women love a bad boy, don’t they? You know the type we mean, chaps: the impossibly good-looking self-declared “toughest guy in the bar”; Jack the lad with his ready wit and savage one-liners; the lovable rogue whose roving eye glints as brightly as his chunky watch beneath the rotating mirror ball and strobes in the club each Saturday night.

For women who crave an unhealthy level of excitement; an unpredictable, hard drinking, emotionally-charged bad boy usually presses all the right buttons, invoking intense emotions and providing a certain kind of high that quieter and milder men simply don’t.

Tom ticks all the bad boy boxes
Across north London, Tom’s boozing is as legendary as his appetite for a fight. His girlfriend, Simone, finds him magnetic and thinks the world of him. Convinced she can change his ways and help transform him from rake into devoted husband and father once they’ve tied the knot, she’s even started ringing around wedding planners, to compare quotes!

But Tom is actually everything a woman seeking a suitable partner as the father of her children shouldn’t be. Why? Because his regular binge drinking has rendered his sperm about as useful as an ashtray on a Harley. The guy has more chance of joining the priesthood and becoming an ordained Father than ever being a biological one.

It’s a ‘lifestyle thing’
Evidence relating to the correlation between unhealthy sperm (and low sperm counts) and excessive alcohol consumption is simply too overwhelming to ignore.

Other lifestyle habits that can cause problems with a man’s ability to produce sufficient, healthy sperm include:

Smoking (all cigarettes are laced with chemicals and toxins)
Taking recreational drugs
Poor diet (particularly one that includes a high caffeine intake) and little or no exercise
Prolonged use of some steroids (many bodybuilders use these), and even
Some treatments intended to help prevent baldness

While Tom is not follically challenged and never takes drugs, eats fast food or pumps iron (he doesn’t need to, he is a natural-born hard man, remember?), he regularly binge drinks.

Fast forward 18 months…

You thought becoming a dad would be a doddle? In your dreams (baby)
Tom thought fathering a child would be as easy as popping the cork off a bottle of Champagne. But it didn’t quite work out that way. As an archetypical functioning alcoholic, he continued with life as normal: working hard, playing hard, and continuing to regularly binge drink as the months passed and Simone became increasingly upset at their inability to conceive.

But what Tom didn’t understand was that excessive alcohol consumption in men has been found to significantly:

lower sperm counts
reduce the sperms’ motility, and
increase the number of abnormal sperm

He also didn’t realise that alcohol is a toxin that had gradually killed off the sperm-generating cells in his testicles. His liver was also functioning abnormally, which interfered with his sperm development and hormone levels.1

In fairness, Tom did make one concession: in his quest to truly consolidate his position locally as ‘the Daddy’ he switched to wearing silk boxer shorts rather than Calvin Klein über-tight trunks – to boost his sperm levels.

What a man!

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